Thursday, March 18, 2010

The Keys and the Cat: Taxidermist Needed

I've just had Mum home from hospital for half a day to visit her cat. She didn't like how I'm looking after the cat. She's furious that I'm letting it use the cat door which she paid to have installed, to go in and out at will. She should take the cat to a taxidermist and get it stuffed, then she can put the cat wherever she wants it and it will stay there. A bit like in Farmville, when you put the horse THERE beside the barn and click on STAY and it doesn't move. Or you can click on ALLOW WALK and next time you log into Farmville the bloody thing has wandered off and you can't find it. Aaargh.

I decided to leave her there with the bloody cat. I'm not a cat lady. I love cats: I have four of them. I think they're very cute and decorative. I feed them well, I get them spayed and vaccinated but I don't fuss. If they don't like their dinner, I don't care. I don't watch them eat. My cats are all semi-feral and just turned up at my place, so they don't really like people, and that's fine with me. Mum doesn't understand me and my cats at all. The cat ladies at the About Cats Forum would hate me if they knew.

She tries to feed the cat all day long. It's very fat. She'll open a small tin of exclusive brand premier cat food with prawns and barramundi and if the cat sniffs it and walks away, she'll believe the cat is 'sick' and want to take it to the vet or she'll believe the cat is starving but doesn't like the cat food so she opens a new tin, and she can open new tins until she's up to number 5 of these $2.80 tiny tins of stuff. This is not caused by the dementia, I remember her doing this when she was 40 years old.

She demanded I give her the keys to the house and side gate before I left. I refused. The other day I brought her home for two hours and she lost the key to the side gate. Goodness knows why she'd even want to go out of the side gate when she was just on a short visit from hospital. Her whole visit was then ruined as she spent the entire time searching for the lost gate key in an absolute panic. I didn't find it on time to avoid having to pay a handyman with a bolt cutter to deal with the problem. But I found the gate key pegged to her bedroom CURTAIN the following day, so I am NOT leaving her in charge of any KEYS, and this is making her so angry.

She doesn't know it yet, but I'm never letting her get her hands on any keys again. They have caused way too many upsets in recent months. As for the cat, I'll keep unlocking the cat door.

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